


for what it's worth

by PhantomWriter



Category: SK8 the Infinity (Anime)
Genre: M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Pining, therapy fic for episode 9
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-13 09:09:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29898843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhantomWriter/pseuds/PhantomWriter
Summary: Joe is never one for violence, but he admits that there’s something darkly satisfying when he hears bones crunching under his fist.
Relationships: Hasegawa Langa/Kyan Reki, Nanjo Kojiro | Joe/Sakurayashiki Kaoru | Cherry Blossom
Comments: 24
Kudos: 484





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> As mentioned in the tag, it's a therapy fic for episode 9. I know the post-credit scene is supposedly that, but I need more.

Kojiro isn’t above admitting that his stare lingers. 

He sighs. At this point, self-reprimanding is an integral part of his subconscious. He clears the counter first, tempted to keep his pace deliberate, and decides that if he doesn’t want to add to Kaoru’s waking pains, he’ll have to lay him down on a bed soon. 

Kojiro commands Carla to stay idle, his voice recognized, and crouches down to maneuver Kaoru into his arms, hands placed under his knees. He lifts him carefully, easily, and he can’t help but note that he’s heavier than he expects. Kojiro brings him upstairs with measured steps as he ascends, though it doesn’t stop Kaoru’s head to tilt and fall against his shoulder further. He doesn’t wake. 

(Idly, Kojiro remembers imagining lifting him like this, in an entirely different scenario, and he tries not to think how pitiful it is that this is the closest that he’ll have of that.) 

He doesn’t hesitate to put Kaoru on his own bed knowing the guest room is dusty with disuse. Kojiro mentally pats himself on the back for keeping the sheets and the overall state of his room clean. He pulls off Kaoru’s glasses, arranges his limbs gently, and tucks him under the comforter. 

Kojiro sits beside him, his stare lingering once more. He plans to set his alarm for tomorrow an hour earlier than his usual. Breakfast. He’ll be whipping up the traditional one for his… guest. He’s confident that he can pull off a perfect _tamagoyaki_. For all Kojiro knows, the prospect of hospital food is what made Kaoru slip out tonight. 

He feels that special fondness he associates with Kaoru at the idea that the latter finds Kojiro’s own space a safer and more comfortable place, enough that it allows him to let his guard down and promptly fall asleep. Kaoru’s hair is rumpled, and Kojiro resists the urge to reach out and run his thick fingers through long silken hair. 

“Good night,” he mutters and exits the room to occupy the spare one next door. The longer he spends next to Kaoru, Kojiro is afraid that he won’t be able to leave.

And considering their history together, he thinks it’s pretty fucking ironic because that’s how it has always been for him, isn’t it? He sticks to Kaoru’s side like the miserable highschool boy that he was, with an internalized desperation to have Kaoru look at him the same way he did to Adam when that piece of shit wasn’t letting his true colors known yet. 

To add insult to the injury, Kojiro wasn’t indifferent to Adam’s brilliance either. He used to admire him too, maybe not as much as Kaoru, but he did consider him a friend once. And when he thought that Kaoru’s significant regard for Adam might not be completely one-sided, Kojiro had set himself up for a quiet acceptance and satisfaction that his childhood best friend found happiness with another close friend of his. 

When he and Kaoru personally witnessed Adam shrugging off the sight of another player who fell off a cliff in the middle of a beef with him, whatever notion of friendship Kojiro might have for Adam evaporated in an instant. It wasn’t difficult to think at first that it might’ve been born out of the jealousy that he pushed back down in the deep recesses of his mind, but Kojiro was glad that he had that foresight to rethink with a clearer mind what he knew of Adam. 

Kaoru wasn’t afforded to have the time for that reevaluation of Adam, and his belief at Adam’s sudden, unexplainable change grew into a bitter ball of resentment instead since Adam left the country. 

Kojiro loathes Adam alone for his deeply-felt absence that seemingly hung over his and Kaoru’s heads like a cloud. 

But maybe he’s the biggest joke after all. Kojiro retains that chill and friendly persona that is bothered by nothing and no one in particular, wears it like a second skin around everyone, including Kaoru eventually, though it’s bits and pieces when it comes to him just so he won’t look at Kojiro, frown, and claim that he doesn’t know him anymore too. 

Kojiro settles himself in the safe bubble of casualness when it concerns his affections for Kaoru. He stays close to him but also draws a clear line between them, a good distance away, where Kaoru won’t look much into Kojiro’s dalliances with various women who won’t and _never_ will be enough. 

It’s rinse and repeat for years, and Kojiro can’t think of a good reason why he’ll have to break that cycle. 

Until now, that is. 

The idea hardly touches his mind on the night of the final round, a match between Langa versus Adam that he thinks a part of him expected. Cherry is absent, on stricter bedrest at home after his adamant refusal to be confined in the hospital, while Joe is struck with a peculiar clarity when he watches Langa spectacularly win against Adam and afterward going straight to Reki who doesn’t fool Langa one bit by hiding among the crowd with his hood pulled up. They speak in low voices, foreheads touching intimately, with Langa hardly caring for the round of cheers and congratulations if they aren’t from his friends while Reki’s sole attention is at their practically blatant display of affection. 

(Joe doesn’t know when they exactly made up, but he allows himself to be glad that his advice did not fall on deaf ears and some people get to have their own corner of happiness despite it all. Despite Adam.) 

Speaking of. 

Joe levels Adam with a gaze that isn’t noticed. Adam is presently occupied with looking _disgustingly_ longingly after a barely adult teenager—and that’s the last straw, maybe. 

Joe is never one for violence, but he admits that there’s something darkly satisfying when he hears bones crunching, fist digging on that stupid porcelain mask, embedding its broken pieces on his knuckles but more importantly on the face underneath. 

Adam is knocked flat out in an instant. 

Joe studies his handiwork briefly, mildly aware of the utter silence that abruptly falls. He knows something rights itself in him a second later when feels a certain calmness and hears his steady heartbeat. 

“That’s for Kaoru.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cherry visits.

Kojiro half-expected to hear from Kaoru after the incident, through phone or with Carla wheeling him in if he’s to visit in person; it’s only been a week, after all. 

What he doesn’t expect is Kaoru standing in wait outside his restaurant when Kojiro returns from a quick grocery. Kaoru looks better and with lesser bandages where underneath he’s still neat and prim. 

“Aren’t you supposed to be resting?” Kojiro asks as he unlocks the entrance. He swings the door open for Kaoru first who is uncharacteristically quiet and usually doesn’t wait for an invitation to be let in—actually, now that Kojiro remembers, doesn’t he have a spare key? “Come in.”

Kojiro doesn’t bring up the matter of the key. He knows why Kaoru is here and it certainly isn’t about that. Surprisingly, Kaoru doesn’t start immediately and appears conflicted, hesitant. He does agree to the offer of tea. 

There’s a silence that blankets them both like a gloomy embrace. Kojiro moves around the kitchen while Kaoru finishes his tea. 

“You punched Adam.”

Kojiro pauses from slicing the onions, continues, and dumps the skin. “Yes,” he says after a minute. “Thankfully before the police can cart him away.”

He heard it from Miya first, then from Shadow, Reki, and Langa through their group chat that somehow Kojiro was included but not Kaoru since his account was private. There was no mention of Ainosuke Shindo’s skating activities and dubious actions within the community, mostly the illegal side of his company, the news article filled with corporate jargon. 

Not that Kojiro particularly cared. Adam still gets to face prison, and Joe got to knock him down before he could be prohibited to do so. It’s a win-win. 

The whole purpose of his sudden trip to the supermarket is to celebrate in the first place. Kaoru’s just an interesting addition, even if he might not share the same sentiment. There’s no way he can ruin Kojiro’s pleasant mood since punching Adam. 

“I don’t need you to defend me,” Kaoru grits out like a well-scripted line. Kojiro is no longer surprised, grunting non-committally as he continues preparing celebratory food. 

“But,” Kaoru goes on, albeit with a lower voice and diminished irritation, “thank you.”

Kojiro halts completely and turns. Kaoru can’t seem to meet his eyes, his brows furrowed as if his own hands offended him. The longer Kojiro has his eyes on him, the deeper the shade of red on Kaoru’s cheeks becomes. 

Ah. 

“What?” Kojiro asks, more out of principle. 

Kaoru scowls at him. “I won’t repeat myself.”

Kojiro notes idly that Kaoru looks, well, cute. And yes, Kojiro just thought a grown-up man cute. Not the time and place, he mentally berates himself. “You’re welcome,” he mutters. 

A smile curls itself on his lips without meaning to, and it’s a smile that he can’t seem to completely wipe off his face as he prepares two servings and observes Kaoru deftly eat with a single arm. 

It should be weird that there’s largely silence in their interaction today that is usually occupied with banter that borders on heatless insults. They’re far from outgrowing that, surely, but Kojiro can’t help but think they passed beyond something inexplicable that even he wasn’t aware was an obstacle in the first place. 

“Hey,” Kojiro begins, “You free next month?”

“For?”

He shrugs. “A trip I guess.”

Kaoru raises an eyebrow but doesn’t shoot down the suggestion. “Where exactly?”

“Don’t know yet. You have somewhere in mind?”

“... Somewhere nearby, within Asia, I suppose.” He tilts his head. “We’ll figure it out.”

Together. Kojiro tries not to grin . “Sure.” 

“Kojiro.”

“Hmm?”

“If—” Kaoru sighs. “ _ Before _ we go, we need to talk.”

Kojiro blinks, then purses his lips. He understands what is implied. “Will it end up with us canceling our plans?” Or, god forbid, not talking to each other altogether. 

“No,” Kaoru replies with certainty, a ghost of a smile gracing his features. “Not at all.”

Kojiro feels something warm in his chest, and while it should take some getting used to, his large hand finds the smaller one beside him, almost automatic as fingers lace together like they’ve done so for years. 

“Okay,“ Kojiro says, squeezing at their entwined hands, “I look forward to it.”

Or maybe there are just some things that don’t take time to learn. 

**fin**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's just 700+ words of Cherry thanking Joe lol


End file.
